Feelings as a family of five

I chose this picture for this post because it brings a huge smile to my face. 

We are a family of five now, our newest foster addition included. 

It is too soon to try and neatly bundle up my feelings on fostering. 

Too hard to answer a quick "how are you?" because there is no quick answer. 

Some moments we're super great and from the outside in I'm sure we look like the all-American, "perfect" family living the dream on a farm.  Other moments are just incredibly challenging and make my eyes fill with tears and my heart hurt and make me want to run and hide. 

But we bravely wake up each day and answer this call. 

It's quiet sometimes, answering this call.  I told Brett it feels like people picture us at home with a new little one, happy as can be.  The truth is we're deep in the trenches.  I am so thankful for a handful of family members and friends who have checked on us faithfully and consistently.  Even when the answer has been "Help! We need prayers! And dinner!".  Even when things at our house aren't pretty or perfect.  Things like dinner, a thoughtful text, a basket FULL to the brim of goodies, prayers, and a simple "do you need anything tomorrow?" have been lifesavers. 

All that to say, we are doing it! We are making it, by the grace and strength of God alone, day by day. I've stopped even trying to make it day by day, instead I try to make it one chunk of the day at a time. 

Can I remind the collective "us" that may be reading how truly needed we are as foster parents? I don't mean Brett and I, I mean "we" collectively.  I think we've received at least a DOZEN messages about kids needing a home in my county just. this. week. 

A dozen. In one week. 

So while I want to be honest with you in this space and not sugar-coat, I also want you to know that even while we're deep in the trenches, we are still so called.  And I pray that many of you are also, because there are babies, children, and teens also in the trenches, only without anyone by their side to give them hope of ever being rescued. 

Ending on a less serious note, I'm happy to say I picked up my camera today and captured my rosy view.  I had desperately prayed lately "Don't let me forget my eyes!", not wanting to lose my vision on the world.  Good news, I haven't lost it. 

I'll share the pictures soon! 

How are you?