Wednesday, May 23, 2012

Everything's fine.

That's the first thing I said to Brett when I talked to him today. 
I went in for a routine check-up for Tiny Torbett and at first Dr. Collins couldn't find the heartbeat. 
She tried and tried. Anna Ruth sat on the floor and ate a cracker. I tried to breathe slowly and calmly as she said we would just do an ultrasound real quick.
I knew from Anna Ruth it can be hard to find the little one's heartbeats..
but still.
In the waiting room doubts filled my mind.
I prayed, okay begged God, for everything to be okay.
Even though I know better.
I know that in this life, sometimes things don't go "okay" 
but that it isn't God's wrath making us learn a lesson.
It's just this life.
It's Satan..who comes to kill, steal, and destroy.
I know that my God loves me...and He quietly reminded me of the verse
"Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you."
*********************
So, I made up my mind that no matter what, I knew everything WOULD be okay.
This story has a happy ending.
Dr. Collins quickly located Tiny One all snuggled up to Mama...heartbeat going just normal.
*******************
Even for the happy endings that don't happen, my prayer lately is that people 
will embrace the love God has for them
and will know in their heart that God has good for them.
He hasn't sent trouble or pain to school them.
I remember a rather difficult time in my life where I had to step up at church and 
unexpectedly lead a group of children because of tragedy..
and I remember God saying to me "I'm sorry....You're going to learn through this,
you're going to do great through my strength...
but I'm sorry this is hard for you.
I felt my God have compassion on me.
***********************

1 comment:

  1. I'm so glad everything is okay and that you got to see that tiny little heartbeat! :)

    ReplyDelete

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